It was only upon reflection recently that I realized how much my parenting style has altered over the years.
When I first posted this, I honestly felt I was doing it all right. Now, a few years later, when I am brutally honest with myself, all I can think of is 'uh-oh' and 'oh no'.
While I acknowledge that I am doing better in some aspects as I become a more experienced mum, I also recognize (with some disbelief) how I have slipped into an unexpected realm in other areas.
Having more parenting experience is certainly a factor that can bring about some change in my beliefs, behaviour and parenting style. But I can't deny that the bigger reason has to be the increased hecticness that comes with raising more kids. With every addition to the family, it also means the days are fuller with an even longer to-do list to handle. Needless to say, having less time to attend to each child on a daily basis has its repercussions. :<
I used to be so much more patient with my boys when they were little. Now, I have a hard time feeling calm and collect when they misbehave. But what bugs me is how throughout the week, I seem to be annoyed by their antics more than ever before. Why do I feel annoyed instead of seeing the problems and challenges they cause as teachable moments of right behaviour? I used to seize every such opportunity to inculcate values and teach them life lessons.
Is it really a case of them behaving worse than before, or am I the one who has taken on unrealistic expectations of appropriate behaviour as the boys grow older?
I can't even remember when was the last time I feel spontaneous enough to just get out to do something.
I know I am a good mum. And I know I work very hard to be a good mum. But I have my failings and I recognise them. Now I must amend my ways.
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