Sometimes I like the idea of sharing with friends and strangers alike. It is especially encouraging when readers tell me they are motivated and inspired by what I've shared and are influenced in a positive way.
I like it that I can help and encourage others, even if it means a few at a time, in this small way.
But there are also times when I would reconsider the pros and cons of making my thoughts and certain aspects of our lives so exposed, to just about anyone.
Maintaining a blog is also sheer hard work. For the blog to remain meaningful, even if it is just to me, means I must be able to keep it up-to-date with our lives. Presently, this alone, is an insane goal to meet.
I have never thought of shutting the blog down though, simply because I enjoy writing. Penning my thoughts and views on matters, which sometimes for different reasons I don't/can't really talk about, also gives me clarity and closure. Blogging can be so therapeutic.
More importantly, the main reason I blog is to record the big and little things about our days, our world and my world. Things that may be mundane to others, but meaningful to me.
Often, I will re-read my old posts to be reminded of the beautiful little things that I have forgotten. And each time, I am grateful that I blogged about them.
I want to stay true to myself and to the things that I'm passionate about. I want to be able to look back years from now and remember the life that I have led and the issues that have mattered to me. I want my kids to read in depth and hopefully appreciate and understand my perspectives of our lives.
But as the kids grow, I find myself more hesitant to talk about them so openly. I always and already have reservations about sharing certain aspects of our lives, so if I start censoring even more, this blog will no longer serve its original intent.
That's my current dilemma.
And I'm still deliberating.