Sunday, September 4, 2011

Pet Peeves

Trust me, there are many.

But as a parent, there are TWO which stand out like sore thumbs.

1. Parents who leave their poorly behaved children in a playground unsupervised.

No, these parents are not somewhere else attending to emergencies. They can usually be found a few tables away chatting and/or sipping coffee.

While playgrounds are great places for children to learn social skills and sort out differences with others and there are merits not to intervene at every opportunity, leaving them entirely on their own to pinch, push and spit at other kids is just not socially acceptable behaviour.

2. Parents who say 'Oh my kids are so challenging to manage. They give me problems at home and in school. But they are very unique individuals, so we must give them time to learn the right behaviour. Anyway, obedience is old fashion, I am glad my kids have characters of their own....' or

'You are so lucky that you have angelic kids who are so obedient..... '

Usually, this comment is accompanied by the other comments such as ....'otherwise I will have as much time as you do... or can do as much as you' or 'that is why I need to have a maid, two grandmas to help me manage my kid(s)' ....

Oh no, sorry sista! Raising kids who are obedient has nothing to do with luck, but everything to do with parenting beliefs and styles.

If you think it is uncool for kids to be obedient (because kids who are must be dumb, boring and without a mind of their own and it is way more cool for kids to have their own characters), then that is where you are wrong.

Being obedient and compliant when the situations called for is harder to achieve than being destructive and poorly behaved. It takes self-discipline, maturity, wisdom, a certain level of emotional intelligence and a healthy dose of respect for self and others.

All kids are by nature curious and innocent and void of malicious intents. Yet, some kids turn out so differently. It is not because they are bad kids. They just have overly-indulging parents who believe that their unique kids are entitled to bad behaviour and the rest of the world must be tolerant and understanding in the meantime. Boo boo.


Jayne said...

Can't agree more.
I can't stand comments that start with "You are so lucky that your kids....." They didn't see all the hard work behind the scenes!

Domesticgoddess said...




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