Monday, August 23, 2010

Parenting Thoughts: The Mediocre and The Great

Some food for thought after a recent interesting read on The Case of $320,000 Kindergarten Teachers (article here).


How hard can it be to teach pre-schoolers? 

Most people will probably conclude that it can't be difficult at all. It definitely isn't rocket science. 

But can everyone do an equally effective job of coaching and guiding pre-schoolers?

Let's see. 

As long as we are literate, we should be able to coach our little ones in their academic progress. What's more, with the resources freely available on the Internet nowadays, it does empower parents and older siblings alike, hence giving the illusion that everyone can teach. 

I do stress the word 'illusion' for good reasons. 

Everyone can provide answers. But NOT everyone can be an effective teacher. 

Even in formal schools, when teachers are supposedly qualified with the right certification, it doesn't mean they will be effective in delivering the lessons and achieving learning outcomes.

How can we tell if a teacher is effective? 

It isn't straightforward but the easiest way is probably to look at the outcomes delivered (i.e. the children's learning progress over a reasonable period of time). 

Great teachers (like great leaders) do not just provide answers. They should be able to inspire a child to want to learn more by heightening his awareness to his world and teaching him how to enquire, hence cultivating his curiosity and intensifying his thirst for knowledge.

Even with a passion to learn, a child's learning progress can be accelerated only if he has good learning habits and positive attitude, which are definitely qualities that effective teachers should and will take pains to instill in the child. 

Passion for teaching and love for a child alone, are also not enough to make one a great teacher, though they may help to motivate a teacher to put in more efforts. 

So, while all parents should and can play an active role in their children's education and learning journey, not everyone can be an effective teacher in delivering a holistic education to their little ones. 

Which is why I don't think homeschooling is a viable option for every family, even if a parent is willing to put in her best efforts. The dismaying academic results at PSLE of some home-schooled children as compared to the national standards tells plenty. 

Perhaps some didn't even bother to try hard enough because of the low importance they place on such methods of assessment. Or perhaps their kids are just not exam-smart and can't deal with the stress of having to perform in a set amount of time because they have been used to a stress-free home-schooled environment?? 

Of course, these families would have good reasons to homeschool their kids in the first place and probably find the consequences acceptable in return for the other benefits. 

It is a case of to each his own. 

8 comments:

Anonymous said...

interesting! thanks for sharing.

i used to think that homeschooling preschoolers can't be that hard too, especially after reading some blogs and looked at those 'fun' ideas. but after trying out for a few months, i gotta admit it is not for me (or us). i screamed at my gal a lot more everyday when she doesn't cooperate or have her 'i don't feel like learning' days. and i also have my 'i don't feel like teaching' days and in the end, i wonder if i do this long-term, will her learning be compromised.

it is the same with enrichment programme. sometimes, i think it makes sense to outsource, simply because a paid programme has a structure and curriculum to follow at every lesson and the teachers are not going to say ' i don't feel like teaching today, so your kid won't learn anything'.

of course agree with you that the quality of teacher is another matter. but if the teacher is not screaming at my kid the way i have to, maybe higher chances that she will learn too? haha

qiong

DG said...

Hi Qiong, thanks for sharing too! I can totally understand what you mean.

It can be so tempting for parents to take it easy and go at snail pace if we are homeschooling our kids, after all, it does feel like there is always 'another tomorrow'.

Or some parents may have unrealistic expectations of what they want their kids to achieve in short span of time.

I do think that whether we are homeschooling or coaching our kids in their academic learning, it is important for parents to consider the level of time/effort they are willing to invest, as well as their level of competencies. If we are not going to be consistent in our efforts, or are not strong in certain subject areas, then it is better to outsource to others (be it daily schools, enrichment centres or tuition teachers).

mum_to_K said...

I always enjoy the insights you share on parenting! Keep up the inspirational and thought-provoking posts.

I must agree that while parents may be the first teacher to their kids, it is important for them to admit to themselves if they are simply not motivated enough to do more.

Jasmine said...

I have been keen follower of your blog for a long time. This post is so meaningful to me.

With my first kid, I used to think that because I am highly educated and quit my high flying career to be a SAHM, I must make it more worthwhile by teaching my gal myself. I used to think of course I can teach my 3 yr old to read! My gal only entered kindy at K2 and prior to that, no enrichment at all. I was very gungho and wanted to do everything myself. I bought all the readers and phonic books and used BFIAR (but not lapbooking) for a while, but I soon realized that teaching phonics is not as easy and my gal learnt many wrong things from me (yes I have double majors at uni and even post-grad diploma but I don't know phonics!).

At first I was relaxed and wanted to be those cool mum who want my child to learn at own pace. And I was not disciplined at all, because like you said, it felt like there is always so many tomorrows to do the work. We would take months off and not do much!

By the time she was almost 5, I realized that she couldn't read as well as I thought she should. Even though she speaks very well, she has difficulty following group activities. And her concentration span is non-existent unless she was doing something that she likes. Give her anything that she doesn't want like (which she perceives as work), and she can't last 3 min!

(I read somewhere in your blog about having positive attitude towards work and that a child who will ONLY learn when learning is fun is in for hard times etc..I thought that was so true!)

Anyway, I enrolled her in K2 and kindy teachers told me she had so much catching up to do. Luckily, she sort of caught up with the rest but it was a hectic K2 and I sort of wished we had done it differently.

with my #2, I am wiser now. I want to be honest with myself. I enjoy arts and crafts (thanks for sharing your ideas; they are great!) and leisure reading with my kids and taking them out for excursions and the occasional projects. But there are many other areas that I decided to outsource. It is better for my sanity and their own benefits.

Thanks for sharing!

DG said...

mum_to_k, thanks! Agree. Only the parents themselves will know if they have done enough and tried their best. If they have tried their best and for whatever reasons, their children are still not progressing well, it is only to their children's benefits to look for alternatives. Or if they simply do not have the time/energy to do more with their children, it is up to them to weigh the pros and cons of relying on external parties.

If they don't, in the end, the only ones who will be affected are still the children and perhaps the parents.

DG said...

Hi Jasmine, it was real nice of you to finally decide to say hi. I appreciate your sharing of your personal experience. I can totally understand. Like you, I wanted to make my time with my kids worthwhile when I quit my job after my #1 was born. So I did a lot with him. I am sure many SAHM are like us. :D

It must be a relief that your gal managed to catch up in K2. Is she in Primary school now and how is she coping?

Anonymous said...

Hi, I stumbled upon your blog by chance and admire your philosophy of raising your children from the few posts that I have read. I am a SAHM living in Malaysia and a first-time mum to a highly inquisitive (more like KPC haha) and spirited 9mth old girl, and as she grows up, we want to help guide her to channel her enthusiasm n curiosity into teaching herself to think and be creative. We want to equip her for life, not just to excel in school; to be confident in giving her best effort, not be afraid of failure. Problem is, I do not have these traits myself. I grew up feeling that not scoring 100% academically meant letting my parents down; that failure was not an option. I was diagnosed as a gifted child but somehow along the way, my insecurities got the better of me and I subconsciously decided that mediocrity was more bearable than the fear of failure and rejection. Living life as a pessimist with a tendency to be depressed is not what I want for her. The problem is, I do not know where to start. Is she too young for me to worry about this? I sing and babysign to her. I wish to do more but am too exhausted just from tending to her daily.

DG said...

Hi, I firmly believe that parental influence and a nurturing environment play a very big role in how a child will turn out. I think the great thing about your current situation is you know what you want for your child. Your own experience will also help you understand what you can/should do and what to avoid.

I personally think it doesn't matter much that parents don't possess the same traits that they like to see in their kids, as long as they are willing to be open-minded about what can be done and are always willing to learn.

My #3 just turned 9 months. Please believe me that they do grow up incredibly fast and your days will be less tiring. So hang in there. :>

While the days feel really long, especially when you are a SAHM (and it always seems to be the hardest for first-time mums), the years are short!

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