Monday, November 29, 2010

Tricking the Tooth Fairy

When Marcus remarked a few weeks ago that one of his front teeth was wobbly, I tried to respond positively and factually and sharing my experience in some comical ways that made him laugh. 

I didn't want to alarm him or cause any anxiety as he expects more teeth to fall out. 

Though I had briefly talked to the boys about it when they asked about the gaps they noticed in their friends' teeth, I had not given the whole milk-teeth-replaced-with-adult-teeth experiences much thought until then. 

My own experience was the only one I knew and oddly enough, I had never compared notes with classmates or adult friends. The Tooth Fairy legend was an alien concept to me until about 2 years ago.

My mum used to instruct my siblings and me to throw our milk teeth out of the window towards the sky if they came from our lower jaw and under our beds if the teeth were from our upper jaw. 

Like good daughters should, I did as I was told, with the hope that my new teeth will grow out straight. There was no reason to doubt mum's wisdom since everyone in the family has straight teeth. *big smile* 

E, on the other hand, had a very different experience.

So when the little boy told his daddy about his wobbly tooth a few weeks ago, his dad spoke of the visits from the Tooth Fairy, who would exchange each tooth placed under the pillow with a gold coin. 

Last Friday, while nibbling rice cakes, the wobbly tooth finally fell out. It was a shame I wasn't there to watch his facial expressions. He was calm when he brought it to me a few minutes later, simply whispering "Mummy, my tooth dropped out."

Wah! The first milk tooth in the hand!!!!  

Short of a better place to save the little piece, I resorted to leaving it in a clean mini ziplock bag, so that the boy could show it to daddy. I forgot about it soon after.

That night, E got Marcus to place the tooth under his pillow, just as planned. 

When morning came, E enthusiastically (he was such a good actor! :P) went to Marcus "Hey, check under your pillow. Did the Tooth Fairy come?"

Marcus lifted his pillow and there it was a shiny gold coin. He appeared a little puzzled but it didn't last more than a few seconds. 

"Yeah, I heard footsteps in the middle of the night and I could feel someone lifting my pillow. I think it was daddy. He placed the one dollar coin under my pillow. He is the Tooth Fairy."

Hahaha!  I laughed so hard, partly because I wasn't aware of their plan to place the tooth under the pillow and I thought it was so comical to exchange a tooth for a coin. But what Marcus said was even funnier. (It is like catching Santa Claus red-handed with his beard down and realizing that Santa is just some guy we know.)

E fervently denied Marcus' theory and insisted it was the Tooth Fairy. 

Chipsy, who was in the room witnessing the whole conversation, was so convinced of the existence of the Tooth Fairy. A discussion ensued. 

Why does the Tooth Fairy take the tooth? 
Why does she give you a dollar for it? 
Is she buying it from you? 
How does she know which children have placed a tooth under their pillows? 
Will she know if we place a piece of seashell cut into the shape of a tooth under a pillow? 

This morning, Marcus came to me with a piece of seashell which he picked from the beach recently. 

"Mummy, the Tooth Fairy didn't give me a dollar coin. I placed this seashell under my pillow. I guess she could tell it is not a tooth even though it is the same color as my tooth."


Hahaha!  I love his innocence. 

Now my sensible little boy is reminding me to give him more milk and calcium-rich food everyday so that his new teeth will be strong. :>  






Saturday, November 27, 2010

Words of Wisdom

Sometimes I wish I could remember all the spontaneous, funny, witty and crazy things that my kids have said. 

But the reality is, I often can't recall much after a while. 

Even recording them on the blog doesn't really capture the essence of it all. If only we could bottle up such memories.

Here are a few of those recent moments of my 4 years old that made me smile. For some instances, I actually had to try hard hiding my smile from him.


I LOVE this photo of him. So cheeky! Taken in Sept 2010 at Zhou's Kitchen.


(1) When the boys were playing Lego side by side, Nicholas offered a wonderful encouragement.

"Marcus, I am so proud of you. You have made an amazing robot!"


(2) Referring to the afternoon spent at the East Coast Park, Nicholas asked Marcus... 

"Do you know why I buried that coconut in the sand yesterday? Because I wanted the people at the beach to be very impressed with me when the coconut grows into a coconut tree". 

I was impressed with his choice of words. 


(3) At a bookstore one day, Nicholas saw a stuffed pig. Absolutely adored it and begged me to buy for him. I declined at first, then he tried different tactics, including this line... 

"If you love me very much, you will want to buy this for me". 



(4) After he was scolded for some bad behaviour, he reacted calmly... 

"I am not going to talk to you anymore because you are not very nice to me. When you are nicer next time, I will change my mind". 



(5) While watching E played a video game that involved killing some demons and monsters (I know... tsk tsk tsk....), the boy suggested ... 

"Kick his face, daddy!"  "Punch him!"

Err... I didn't know whether to laugh or not. Where did he learn that from?  



Thursday, November 25, 2010

Preparing for Primary One: As Reality Sinks In

My 6-year-old set foot in his Primary One classroom recently, during the Orientation Day. 

I am impressed with the way his classroom looks. :>   Actually every classroom was different, all complete with very different styles and themes. 




This is a far cry from the way my primary and secondary school classrooms used to look. 

There is about a month left before the school year begins, so I must get my act together to prepare him for school.

We've got the books at the orientation and I had a quick look through them all the next day. English and Maths seem easy enough for M. Even the standard of the Chinese books look manageable. There are surprisingly few difficult words or phrases! More on our preparation for Chinese in a coming post... 

I procrastinated for a while and finally got his school uniforms early this week. I decided to buy the size that looks just right on him, instead of settling for an oversized set and wait for him to grow into them, just to save a few dollars. Though it is likely I would have to buy him new sets a year later, I figured it is a worthwhile expense if it means he will look smart everyday and feels good about himself. 

I remember my mum used to buy me oversized uniforms. My shirts were so big that I could hide a chicken underneath if I wanted to. My skirts used to be so long that my mum had to take in at least 2 inches from the hem. Then every year, she would alter the hems to lengthen them slightly. Of course she was being sensible and thrifty because money was scarce back then. 

Now, I still need to make a decision on whether to walk him or send him via school bus and get around to shop for his school bag, stationery and shoes. 

I still can't decide which ergonomic bag to buy. He is only 17kg! Any feedback or suggestion, anyone? 

And we have to start on the hardest part of it all - to get him and me into the routine of waking up at 6am and begin the day bright and ready. 






Wednesday, November 24, 2010

Beyond the SAT and GPAs

The article "To get the real stars, college admissions should look beyond SATs" first appeared in the Washington Post, then in our Straits Times. 

Interesting nuggets... 
~ we should assess and value analytical, creative and practical skills and wisdom, not just the ability to memorize or do well on tests. And we should admit people on the basis of their potential for leadership and active citizenship - people who will make a positive, meaningful and enduring difference to the world.

~ the theory of successful intelligence: based on the idea that people are meaningfully intelligent only to the extent that they can formulate and achieve their goals by synthesizing their creative, analytical and practical skills and their wisdom. People need creative skills to generate new ideas, analytical skills to determine if they are good ideas, practical skills to implement their ideas and wisdom to ensure that their ideas help achieve a common good.

~ a "creative" question... others might ask students to draw something, such as a design for a new product; to post a video on YouTube; or to imagine an alternate history (what if the Nazis had won World War II?). An analytical question, meanwhile, might ask a student what his favorite book is and why. A practical question might ask a student how he convinced a friend of an idea. And a wisdom-oriented question might ask him how a high school passion might be turned toward the common good later in life.


Food for thought. 

Tuesday, November 23, 2010

The 'Late Bloomers' Excuse

It really annoys me when I come across people who use the "late bloomers" reason to argue about the unfairness and disadvantages our education system has placed on (their) children. Like this example.

The same goes for those who argued that their Primary 3 kids whose birthdays fall on the later part of the year should be given special treatment during the streaming examinations. Why? 

(Oh, because it is unfair to place them in the same group as those born in the first 6 months of the year, as these slightly older children will have more time to learn!!!)

*rolls eyes*

For a 4 year-old-child, it is a fair reason since a few months of difference in dates of birth could really mean a big deal. Consider a Jan 2006 vs a Dec 2006 child entering Kindergarten 1 next January. 

The child who has 12 months more time to learn to read or acquire social skills may have a slight advantage in the beginning. Notice I say 'may' and not 'will', because it depends on factors such as the availability of learning opportunities and the nurturing environment the child grew up in. So it is also possible for the younger child to have acquired the same level of, if not more advanced, skills by the time he starts K1. 

Even if he has not, by the time the child has started Primary One, this difference should be almost evened out. After all, kids would have time in the Kindergarten years to acquire the necessary skills and if they struggle, isn't it the parents' responsibilities (as much as the teachers') to give them all the help needed to ensure they achieve the minimum standard of competencies? 

To cite 'late bloomers' and 'year-end babies' as reasons for poor academic performance at PSLE is so lame. If at age 12, the child can't understand the importance of doing well at the PSLE examinations, and is not putting in sufficient efforts to ensure reasonable results, then perhaps something is wrong with the upbringing of the child. 

Let's say our child may not truly appreciate the full impact that a less-than-desirable PSLE performance may have on their academic career, and there are 12-year-old who aren't mature enough to think so far ahead. But if we, as parents, have instilled good learning habits, discipline and work ethics in them, these children will still be putting in their best effort.

They may not turn out the best results we expect at this stage, but if they have tried their best, shouldn't it be good enough for now?

If they are truly late bloomers (which by Wikipedia definition is one whose talents and capabilities are slow to develop and show), they will catch up later even if they ended up in a not-too-ideal Secondary school. Especially if we have already instilled in them the positive attitudes and equip them with the essential life skills. 

I am not going to hide my disdain for those lazy teenagers who need to be scolded or threatened by their parents before they put in any time to revise for their GCE 'O' Levels. They would much rather hang out with friends or play computer games than revise their work because the latter is not as fun. Does it matter to them that they may fail, hence not qualifying for further studies? Have they considered that they may have to join the workforce at 16 and earn meagre sums? Most probably not. Judging from the cases that I know personally, these teens also do not understand the value of money. 

If these unmotivated teens were to flunk their examinations, can the parents complain that it is because our education system did not cater to their late bloomers? Whether it is at age 12, 16 or 18, there will always be unmotivated students. 

To motivate the children to do well academically has a lot to do with teaching them the right values. Instead of passing the bucket and pointing fingers at the teachers for failing to engage our kids with interesting lessons or motivate our children enough to want to learn, or slamming the public education system for not considering the needs of our late-bloomers, parents should realize that the first and rightful place to teach values to kids is home. It all starts from the home environment. 



Monday, November 22, 2010

Friday, November 19, 2010

Fostering a Culture of Inquisitiveness

We have been told on a daily basis that the world which our children grow up in will be drastically different from our times. 

But has our style of parenting changed as well? Are we progressive enough in the way we coach and parent our children?

With the Internet revolution, information on just about anything is accessible at a click. Not only is it not possible for one person to remember massive amount of information at his fingertips, the competitive advantage is also no longer on one's ability to collect and remember tons of facts.

The premium now, is on critical analysis, i.e. knowing what questions to ask, what information you need and where to look for such information. 

What is also very important is to have the courage and self-confidence to challenge the information given, to question its validity and make our own judgments. 

If a child can think creatively to derive at out-of-the-box solutions when presented with a problem that he has never seen or experienced before, he has a competitive edge. 

The same goes for a child who is able to form his own opinions on an issue and has the language ability to express his views and hold his side of the argument when facing critics. 

The child also gains the upper hand when he learns to live with ambiguities and is flexible in his approach to resolve problems he encounters. It is only when he has learnt to accept the fact that in many cases, there is more than one way to skin a cat, will he truly be able to think creatively, question the norm and seek out the alternative solutions. 

Unlike the genetic traits in our kids, which we may not have much control over, the higher-order thinking skills such as critical thinking and creative thinking skills can be taught and honed. 

While the child's temperament may play a part, the biggest determinants are still the availability of learning opportunities to train and equip the child in his acquisition of such skills and the way the child is coached in his learning environment. 

I've met numerous bright 5 and 6 years old in my lapbooking classes. While most may be brilliant at answering questions and are able to read independently, it doesn't take long for one to figure out that these kids are very used to being taught and spoon-fed with information by teachers/parents. 

Many are interested in seeking the correct answer instead of being comfortable with situations which could have multiple possibilities. 

A lot of pre-schoolers (and I bet the situation is the same in lower primary level) have been so conditioned to being taught by school and enrichment teachers and/or parents, that they just wait to be taught, instead of seeking out opportunities to learn. 

It is always interesting (to me) to observe how most kids will draw a blank when presented with the specially designed scenarios in class which challenged their abilities to think independently and problem-solve, especially when they first joined the Bright Minds Lapbookers programme.

Over the weeks and months, when they have acquired more experience and exposure to such situations that take them out of their comfort zones, most kids will begin to put what they have learnt into use. 

The brain is a pattern seeker. If a child is exposed to creative thinking at an early age and the brain is taught the creative thinker's mindset, the child will be able to continue with this pattern of thinking with great ease, as if it is his second nature. 

Such is the kind of life skills we should be investing time and effort in. Of course, the process of fostering a culture of inquisitiveness takes time to reap rewards, but it is surely possible. 






Monday, November 15, 2010

The Wimpy Kid, Iron Giant and more

In the last 2 years, E has been diligently introducing a wide range of books to Marcus.

For almost every visit he made to Kinokuniya, which is his top choice of book store in Singapore, he would walk out with a bag of books. Usually, at least half of them would be for the boys. He really spares no expenses when it comes to purchasing books.

This is one area which we differ greatly.

I am a library-goer who lugs back 18 books every fortnight for the boys, and would think thrice before spending any money on new books. 

E, on the other hand, visits the library once every few years, but he won't bat an eyelid to spend a few grands at Kinokuniya every quarter.

Despite my protests (and sometimes nagging) of the lack of storage space on our bookshelves and the crazy amount spent on books each month, I still find new books in the house every few weeks.

Now, I have learnt to keep my mouth shut, and be grateful that this is his way of showing love for the boys. At least, when he brings back those fat books, he is also happy to be the one reading to the boys. 

Here are a few of those fascinating reads which Marcus has read several times, from cover-to-cover. While they appear to be a little too advanced in content and plot for little Chip, he has enjoyed the reading sessions just as much as his brother. In fact, he doesn't seem to be lost in the plot at all, going by the fact that he is able to narrate the stories back to us with details. One thing for certain, he has picked up a fair number of new words, and once again, demonstrated his incredible memory power for a 4 years old. :>








This is such a funny read. Marcus has read the first two books countless times, often during the brief periods when he has to wait for something.








I am not familiar with these two books, but the boys are. They are able to narrate the stories to me in great details and seem to really enjoy them. 


Like all good fathers, E can't wait to share with his boys the wonderful books that he has read in his childhood. Recently, he has also introduced to Marcus new genres such as horror stories for young readers and science fiction books. Some are eagerly received by our avid reader, while others have been shelved for various reasons. 

As always, I am relieved and happy that E places such high emphasis on literacy and is taking a proactive approach to educating the kids. Especially since I have my hands full coaching the boys in the other areas of development. 



Wednesday, November 10, 2010

Eye-Opener Trash

One of our DVD players was spoilt recently. 

Before it was dumped in the trash, E recognised the wonderful opportunity the junk has presented! 

So the 3 boys sat down to eagerly take the set apart and examine the fascinating parts within. 

I overheard E showering the kids with lots of jargons and the boys bombarding him with questions. 






Boys were intrigued to no end!  :>  

I couldn't help but think of my own experience. If only my brothers were raised this way too. 

My dad had no interest in fixing things around the house. When something was broken, he just hired help. When it couldn't be fixed, it was binned faster than the kids could lay any fingers on them. We were never invited nor permitted to take things apart to examine them. 

My mum used to complain about my younger brother who was very interested in dismantling things and putting them back again. Like all typical kids who were forbidden to pursue their interests, he would secretly do so to her small radio and his toy cars and whatever else that he could find. It drove her mad. To her, it was destructive and an useless hobby. Of course, she didn't know better back then, that my little brother was honing his skills. 

I suppose I would go nuts too if my boys were to engage in some frequent dismantling of all our working electronics at home. Haha. But with more education and a different parenting style and belief (I'm not saying I'm a better parent than my parents), I would probably channel their energy to it differently and provide some proper outlets for them to experiment. 

E, on the other hand, had a very different kind of upbringing from my brothers - the kind that all boys deserve.

My boys are truly lucky, to have a daddy like him. 


Friday, November 5, 2010

What's Keeping Him Busy?


On the days when I am more critical of myself, I feel guilty about neglecting my 4 years old. But on other days, I know I really should not be feeling this way. 

Come January next year, when his older brother starts Primary One, I will have a solid few hours of alone time with him. I can make it up to him then. 

For now, he is doing well. In fact, really well, if I remember that he is only 4! 

He has been keeping himself really busy. Besides playing (Lego, train-set, make-believe, puzzles etc... ) on his own or with Marcus, there are these three other activities which he likes to spend his daily time on.


(1) Writing: Lots and lots of adorable stories by our little storyteller. He is starting to spell a few simple words just on his own. He keeps asking for help to spell other words and is so keen to write! 


Peter says I don't want to go to school. So his mom didn't like Peter. Mum took off his pants and send a SOS. When she sent the SOS, she had a tummyache. 

(He learnt about SOS from another book which I was reading to him at that time. He was fascinated with it!)

Dad was hungry but there was no food. What can we do? Good question. There was a big sandwich and a man took the sandwich. 

This really cracks us up! Especially the part on 'good question!'. Hee hee... I know where he gets that from. :P


The two children is not going to play. I know on this day. 

(He had originally told us a longer version of this story but after writing the first two sentences, he decided he didn't want to write the rest anymore). 


(2) Drawing: Very, very inspired by Marcus, so he is drawing ROBOTS now. And still lots of mazes. :> 











(3) Reading: 
I am really, really happy with his progress. :D  He is so confident of his own reading ability right now that he actually enjoys reading aloud to me. His speed is up and he is so much more fluent than before. His ability to comprehend stories is also remarkable for his age. It certainly helps that he has a good foundation in the language and his vocabulary is very strong. 


There is still work to be done, but we are getting there! Well done, baby! 

Wednesday, November 3, 2010

Gifted Development


Chanced upon a fascinating piece of article on What We Have Learnt About Gifted Children. 

I don't believe in assessments, especially in our Singapore context. There are no real advantages to be assessed. But there are many other good points in the article. 

Another related article - Gifted vs. Bright Learners.

Definitely food for thoughts.







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